The reality we face is sometimes so grim that we can’t imagine anything better. At some point, someone could have told you that you would never make it. Sometimes, that someone was you. You looked in the mirror and saw all of your flaws and imperfections and thought, that will never be me. This is all I am, all I could ever be.  A nothing, a nobody, and I’m stuck here forever.

Maybe you even put up a good front, but inside it’s a different story. Or maybe you just never had a dream, never really wanted anything or never really saw yourself anywhere- you know those ‘where do you see yourself five years from now’ kinda questions? Whatever the situation, this is for you.

FIRST OF ALL, YOU NEED A DREAM 

First of all, PLEASE dream. It’s okay to dream. We need an escape from reality sometimes, so its okay to think of or go to a better place in your mind. Next, it’s your dream, so even if it’s the most ridiculous thing ever, if that is what you want, dream it (please, within legal and ethical boundaries people!!!). It’s in your mind at least, no one can see it to mock or laugh at it. Let that be your safe place. Take note though, don’t dream so much that you hide there and never come out. You need to come back and work on achieving your dreams (insert post about achieving your dreams one step at a time or something like that as a link). And if it’s one of those unattainable ones like living in Hogwarts for instance (hahaha, don’t we all wish), think of why you like that dream, what you want and desire when you dream of that. Look for the similarities – safety, fun, friends, challenges, etc, (whatever it was that gave you the feel-good feeling, whatever role you saw yourself playing in the dream) and try to work at achieving in real life, those things that are similar to what you wanted or desired in that dream.

What if You Don’t Have A dream

If you don’t have any dream yet, rather than giving up try instead to focus on more general wants and plans rather than the specifics. For instance, it may be difficult to say whether you want to be an entrepreneur in your own job, or the managing director of a successful business or maybe just a happy mother taking care of her kids in peace. It may however be easier to know that in five years time, you would like to see yourself healthy, happy, financially stable etc. 

How Do I Go About This?

So ask yourself, what would I like to see when I look at myself a few years from now? And I’m not talking about those CEO of etc company, earning five million a year kinda stuff. No. More like happy, at peace, fit, healthy, good network of friends, colleagues and family, financially stable, etc. Winning an award for something counts as well and you don’t even have to know what it is yet. With these goals in mind, start to work on the specifics. Take steps towards achieving this piece by piece. A little more effort to say hi to someone, a fifteen minute walk today, a little more frugality, etc. One step at a time.

Work on those that are attainable and within your control 

e.g. rather than I want to be married, maybe say I want to take more steps towards improving myself and making myself ready for marriage. I also want to take steps that will facilitate this, so being a little more social, etc. There are no hard and fast rules and to each his own.

Dream Big

The reality we face is sometimes so grim that we can’t imagine anything better. At some point, someone could have told you that you would never make it. Sometimes, that someone was you. You looked in the mirror and saw all of your flaws and imperfections and thought, that will never be me. This is all I am, all I could ever be.  A nothing, a nobody, and I’m stuck here forever.

Maybe you even put up a good front, but inside it’s a different story. Or maybe you just never had a dream, never really wanted anything or never really saw yourself anywhere- you know those ‘where do you see yourself five years from now’ kinda questions? What ever the situation, th is is for you.

FIRST OF ALL, YOU NEED A DREAM 

Have a Dream

PLEASE dream. It’s okay to dream. We need an escape from reality sometimes, so its okay to think of or go to a better place in your mind. It’s also your dream, so even if it’s the most ridiculous thing ever, if that is what you want, dream it (please, within legal and ethical boundaries people!!!). It’s in your mind at least, no one can see it to mock or laugh at it. Let that be your safe place. Take note though, don’t dream so much that you hide there and never come out. You need to come back and work on achieving your dreams. And if it’s one of those unattainable ones like living in Hogwarts for instance (hands up if this is you), think of why you like that dream, what you want and desire when you dream of that. Look for the similarities, safety, fun, friends, challenge, etc, (whatever it was that gave you the feel good feeling, whatever role you saw yourself playing in the dream) and try to work at achieving in real life, those things that are similar to what you wanted or desired in that dream.

What if You Don’t Have A dream

If you don’t have any dream yet, rather than giving up try instead to focus on more general wants and plans rather than the specifics. For instance, it may be difficult to say whether you want to be an entrepreneur in your own job, or the managing director of a successful business or maybe just a happy mother taking care of her kids in peace. It may however be easier to know that in five years time, you would like to see yourself healthy, happy, financially stable etc. 

How To Go About This

How?

So ask yourself, what would I like to see when I look at myself a few years from now? And I’m not talking about those CEO of etc company, earning five million a year kinda stuff. No. More like happy, at peace, fit, healthy, good network of friends, colleagues and family, financially stable, etc. Winning an award for something counts as well and you don’t even have to know what yet. With these goals in mind, start to work on the specifics. Take steps towards achieving this piece by piece. A little more effort to say hi to someone, a fifteen minute walk today, a little more frugality, etc. One step at a time.

Work on those that are attainable and within your control 

For instance, rather than ‘I want to be married’, maybe say I want to take more steps towards improving myself and making myself ready for marriage. I also want to take steps that will facilitate this, so being a little more social, etc. There are no hard and fast rules and to each his own.